“There's
this glorious and astounding magic that happens when I put pen to paper or
fingertips to keyboard. I go to this alternate realm of
consciousness. It's where I meet characters who speak to me, who take
me to interesting places, and
who introduce me to compelling situations. I'm
not certain where any of this comes from because
none of it was there when I sat down, when
I was convinced I didn't have any words in me. But still, it's all there. So even when the thought of a blank page makes me feel a
little queasy, I force myself into that chair anyway. And
it's after a minute or two of laying down those once elusive words that
I have to wonder what all the fuss was about. The words come; they always
do.” -- Jim Vines
QUOTE FOR THE DAY...
YOUR QUESTIONS & MY ANSWERS (#1)...
Q: I want to write screenplays, but I don’t know where to begin. What’s the best way to get started?
A: My foremost
guidance? Delve deep into the art, craft, and mechanics of screenplay writing.
Begin with a selection of instructional books. A handful of well-regarded
resources should be enough. Take some time to explore and identify the books
that come with strong endorsements from fellow screenwriters. Progress to
perusing a variety of produced screenplays. A simple online search for “free
movie screenplays” will unlock a treasure trove of resources. Watch the films
these scripts birthed. Then, revisit the scripts—not just as a reader, but as a
student of the craft. By this juncture, you’ll have amassed a wealth of
knowledge to propel you into writing your inaugural script. And then, take the
plunge—seat yourself and commence writing. I won’t prescribe an outline just
yet, nor will I dictate the medium of your writing. This journey is yours to
chart, through trial and error, learning and evolving. Find your stride, your
method, your voice.
“DO THE WORK.” Those
three words encapsulate the essence of growth. Now, brace yourself for the
first draft—a wild ride through any genre, any story. Perfection isn’t the goal
here (remember, “Don’t get it right, just write”). Pour your heart onto those pages.
Once you’ve wrestled your draft into existence, share it with three or four
trusted, discerning friends. Seek their insights: Did any scenes meander
aimlessly? Was the dialogue authentic? Did characters leap off the page or fall
flat? Their feedback will be your compass, guiding you toward refinement.
Equipped with feedback,
embark on the rewrite odyssey. The path you choose is uniquely yours. Some
writers are digital purists, while others, like myself, prefer the tangible
feel of paper and the flourish of a red pen before digitizing their edits. This
journey is personal, a voyage of discovery. Screenwriting isn’t a
one-size-fits-all craft; it’s about finding what resonates with YOU.
Dismiss the notion of
selling your debut script. The marketplace is tough, and the likelihood of your
first script being picked up is slim. Treat these initial attempts as your
apprenticeship in the craft. It may take multiple scripts before you pen one that’s
market-ready. In fact, the harsh truth is that a saleable script may never
emerge from your efforts. Screenwriting demands a blend of artistry and
craftsmanship, and not everyone is cut out for it. I, for one, can’t draw to
save my life, but that’s the reality of art—it’s not for everyone.
Screenwriting has become a popular arena, with many eager to try their hand at it. With technology at our fingertips, anyone can attempt to write the next blockbuster. But the question remains: can you? So, dive in. Give screenwriting everything you’ve got. Write with fervor, learn from each word, and let the journey shape you!
Screenwriting Book of the Week...
A BEAST IS BORN
A BEAST IS BORN
PLOT TWISTS: BALANCING SURPRISE AND PLAUSIBILITY...
When your lead
character pulls off an “amazing” escape, it’s essential to lay the groundwork early.
Take a script I critiqued: our protagonist, a woman on the run, suddenly hops
into a stolen plane and soars away, leaving frustrated cops below. The catch?
For the first 90 pages, we had no inkling she could fly an airplane. No need
for a lengthy backstory, but a subtle hint would’ve sufficed—maybe a passing
comment about her past aviation adventures. And then there’s that corridor
scene. Our woman, cornered, pushes a hidden button, revealing a secret door.
But wait—this location wasn’t previously established! It’s like she stumbled
into a parallel universe. Let’s keep our heightened reality plausible.
Audiences will suspend disbelief, but they won’t tolerate eye-rolling moments.
My journey from idea,
to script,
to script,
BLENDING GENRES
BLENDING GENRES
It can be a delicate
art. Action/Adventure, Sci-Fi/Action, Sci-Fi/Thriller, and Comedy/Drama are all
classic combinations that work. But caution is key when venturing beyond these
boundaries. I once reviewed a script that was a hodgepodge of Sci-Fi, Comedy,
Drama, Musical, and Western elements. Imagine space cowboys and musical
showdowns—quite the chaotic concoction. Experimentation is part of the creative
process, but remember, moderation is your ally. Once you’ve made your mark as a
seasoned writer, then you can play with genre conventions. Take, for example, a
script that aimed to mimic Pulp Fiction’s
dark comedy but missed the mark on both humor and entertainment. Its climax,
featuring a hitman’s heinous acts, was far from comedic. It’s a stark reminder:
know your genres and strive for harmony in your storytelling.
If you'd enjoy a novel about a struggling Hollywood screenwriter,
then I hope you'll check out...
GET THE WORK DONE...
GET THE WORK DONE
Writing is a daily
discipline for me, a commitment I uphold nearly every day. It’s not always
about churning out pages; sometimes it’s organizing thoughts, outlining, or
refining ideas. Each day, I dedicate anywhere from half an hour to six hours,
depending on whether I’m drafting or revising. This routine, which spans 5 to 7
days a week, is crucial for maintaining momentum and productivity. As for my
writing spots, they’re as varied as life itself. From the tranquility of
beaches to the bustle of coffee shops, I find inspiration in the energy of life
around me. While home offers comfort, it’s the vibrancy of public spaces that
truly fuels my creativity. To me, these writing sessions aren’t work; they’re a
joyous exploration of endless possibilities that a blank page represents. For
fellow writers, I say: find your own haven of creativity and make writing a
consistent part of your life. It’s all about putting in the effort and letting
the words flow.
PASSION?
A few years back, a producer with whom I had previous engagements approached me with a proposition: to write a screenplay about Edgar Allan Poe. This producer wasn’t just anyone—he had a string of produced films to his name, and the opportunity seemed ripe with potential. He was even willing to offer a reasonable sum for my writing services.
He shared his vision for a script that would delve into a particular chapter of Poe’s life. On paper, it was intriguing. Yet, internally, I hesitated. My passion didn’t typically lie with tales of 19th-century poets and authors, even if they were as enigmatic as Poe. Nevertheless, the allure of the project’s challenges won me over. I convinced myself that there was a compelling narrative to be woven from Poe’s tumultuous life and controversial marriage to his cousin.
Contracts were drafted, meetings ensued, and a commencement check landed in my bank account. I rolled up my sleeves and got to work.
The following eight weeks were a testament to perseverance. While sparks of enjoyment and fascination occasionally broke through, the truth was that my heart wasn’t fully committed to the story. Despite this, I powered through, piecing together a 110-page screenplay that I dubbed the “first draft”—a term I use loosely, as it was more akin to a third or fourth iteration.
I sent off the draft to the producer, laden with the premonition that it might not meet his expectations. It was a script born not out of pure inspiration but out of a sense of obligation—a reality that weighed heavily on me.
A few days after
submitting my script, the producer, a connoisseur of dining and deals, invited
me out for lunch—a setting he favored for discussions. We met the next day,
enjoyed a pleasant meal, and then he shared his thoughts. He appreciated the
script’s intriguing moments and sharp dialogue, but felt it wasn’t steering in
the direction he envisioned. Consequently, my involvement with the project came
to an end. No hard feelings, though. In fact, months later, he enlisted my
skills for a rewrite on a contemporary thriller—a genre where I truly thrive.
This experience
reinforced a valuable lesson for me: Write with passion, write what resonates
with you. Anything less is a disservice to yourself and, if you’re being
compensated, to the person funding your work. Passion is the pulse of authentic
writing; without it, the words may exist, but the soul of the story remains
elusive.
Psst...
I wrote a novel about a screenwriter.
You'll love it.
You'll love it.
Click here!
DON'T TAKE “NO!” FOR AN ANSWER!
My real-world experiences are a testament to the unpredictable nature of the industry and the value of perseverance.
Once upon a time, I handed my horror script to a “respected” screenplay analyst. He was on the hunt for scripts to produce. After a couple of weeks, he delivered his verdict: “Sorry, I just don’t care for it.” Ouch. But little did I know that this seemingly discouraging moment would lead to unexpected twists. In the years that followed, I managed to option that very same script to not one, but two production companies that saw its potential. It turns out that while the analyst didn’t see the magic, others did. Lesson learned: one person’s rejection doesn’t define your script’s destiny. But the rollercoaster ride continued.
My manager arranged a meeting with a director who hungered for fresh scripts. I pitched three ideas: two horror scripts and one thriller. The director’s response? He dismissed the horror concepts outright—no love there. However, the thriller idea caught his attention. He requested to read it. Hope bloomed. A week later, the director’s verdict arrived: “Thanks, but no thanks.” Disappointment? Sure. But then fate intervened. A few months down the line, I optioned that very same thriller script to a production company that embraced it with open arms. They loved it enough to renew the option after a year. Suddenly, my script had a new lease on life. And here’s the kicker: those two horror scripts the director didn’t care for? Well, I went ahead and optioned BOTH of them over the next few years. Turns out, even rejection can’t stop a determined writer.
In 2005, I was inspired
to create a collection of interviews with screenwriters who were actively
earning their livelihood through their craft. These weren’t necessarily the
marquee names but rather the unsung wordsmiths of the industry. Despite my
enthusiasm, publishers were less than optimistic. The responses ranged from
“Interview books don’t sell,” to polite rejections wishing me luck. Undeterred
by the lack of publisher interest, I pursued the project with vigor. I quickly
connected with 16 screenwriters, each sharing their unique journey and
insights. To my delight, David Trottier, author of “The Screenwriter’s Bible,”
agreed to pen the foreword, adding a touch of prestige to the endeavor.
I took the plunge into
self-publishing, releasing Q & A: The Working Screenwriter as a paperback
in 2006, followed by an e-book version years later. The book’s journey has been
gratifying, to say the least. It’s performed admirably over time, even opening
doors to opportunities such as being invited to speak at the Scriptwriter’s
Network—an honor that speaks volumes about the book’s impact and reach.
I recall a producer, a
seasoned gentleman with a flair for the artistic, who took a shine to my horror
screenplays. His track record with art-house films was impressive, and his
interest in my work was a promising sign. Initially, he secured an option on
one of my scripts, and about a year later, he did the same with another. He
embarked on the arduous journey of fundraising for both projects. Despite his
efforts and our shared optimism, the financing didn’t come through. Yet, this
twist of fate didn’t dampen his belief in my writing. Recognizing the potential
in my words, he commissioned me to pen two additional screenplays. This time,
it was more than just an option; it was a job that came with a genuine
paycheck.
Once upon a time, back
in the '80s, I penned a stage play—a labor of love, fueled by creativity and a
dash of audacity. But it wasn’t until 2006 that I revisited that old script and
thought, “Maybe it’s time to breathe life into these words.” Navigating the
murky waters of play production was uncharted territory for me. Armed with
determination, I reached out to an actor I’d met—an actor who also happened to
own a theater. Fate smiled upon me; he was actively seeking plays to produce. I
sent him my script, and his response was music to my ears: he loved it! The
wheels were set in motion—casting, staged readings, rehearsals—all the
ingredients for a theatrical feast. But then, like a magician’s vanishing act,
he disappeared. The project fizzled out, leaving me with dashed hopes and a
lingering question mark. Undeterred, I fast-forwarded to 2009. Perhaps
lightning could strike twice? I queried various theater groups, bracing myself
for the familiar chorus of polite rejections: “No thanks,” “Not our cup of tea,”
“Too many characters.” It seemed my play was destined to remain in the shadows.
And then, like a beacon in the fog, came the golden response: “Yes, we love
it!” Finally, a theater group saw the potential. The curtains rose just a
couple of months later, and my play took flight. True, it only graced the stage
for three weeks, but those were three weeks of magic—the kind that lingers in
the hearts of both creators and audiences. So, here’s to the tenacity of the
human spirit and the resilience of words. My play may not have conquered
Broadway, but it danced under the spotlight, and that, my friends, was a sweet
success!
Countless tales echo the same truth: the unpredictable nature of life’s journey. One moment, a door may close, casting shadows of doubt; yet, in the next, another door swings wide open, ushering in a beam of opportunity. It’s the serendipitous dance of chance and endeavor. But amidst the pursuit of writing—a craft that can be as rewarding as it is challenging—lies the essence of existence. To truly live is to embrace the world beyond the written word. Cherish moments with family, bond with friends, travel to distant lands, and immerse yourself in adventures. These experiences enrich not only the soul but also the stories we tell. As you navigate the writer’s path, let your passion fuel your craft. Send your finest work into the world, persist with tenacity, and hold fast to hope. Never surrender to the siren call of defeat. The road may be strewn with trials, but it’s also lined with unexpected joys. Stay the course, and you may just find yourself marveling at the wondrous tapestry of events that unfold. May your life be as vibrant as your narratives, and may your stories reflect the fullness of your lived experiences. Keep writing, keep living, and let the surprises of life inspire you!
Psst!
Do ya like novels about screenwriters?
Then I hope you'll check out Luigi's Chinese Delicatessen!
Do ya like novels about screenwriters?
Then I hope you'll check out Luigi's Chinese Delicatessen!
Patience is a virtue...
I recently came across
a post from a budding screenwriter on a forum, riddled with anxiety as he
awaited feedback on his submitted script. His distress was palpable, and while
many offered sound advice, I felt compelled to share my perspective. Screenwriting
is not for the faint of heart. It’s a tumultuous journey, filled with highs and
lows, and not every script will receive the attention it deserves. You might
find yourself in a void of silence after submitting your work or strung along
with promises of “I’ll get to it soon” that lead nowhere. Occasionally, you’ll
encounter someone who adores your script, and for a brief moment, everything
seems perfect—until they vanish, leaving you with unanswered calls and emails.
And sometimes, you’ll collaborate closely with a producer, revising your
script, discussing casting and locations, only to have the project abruptly
canceled. It’s a harsh reality, but it’s the nature of the business. The key is
to remain undeterred. Always have another script in the works and never hinge
all your hopes on a single project. Waiting on responses from agents or
producers can be maddening, so keep writing, keep creating, and stay grounded.
Embrace the unpredictable scriptwriting journey with resilience, and remember,
every setback is a setup for a comeback. Keep pushing forward and let your
passion for storytelling be your guiding light.
Follow the journey from idea to
award-winning short horror film:
award-winning short horror film:
JUMPIN' THROUGH HOOPS...
JUMPIN’ THROUGH HOOPS—AND NOT EVEN GETTING’ PAID FOR IT!
Screenwriters often
voice their frustrations about endless rewrites requested by producers who’ve
shown interest in their work. These aren’t the producers actively developing a
project; they’re the ones who dangle the carrot of potential production. The
term “producer” is used loosely here—many claim the title without the
credentials to back it up. They might be well-intentioned, promising to bring
your script to life on screen, but without tangible results, these promises
don’t pay the bills.
Imagine you have a
script that a producer “loves”—a term you’ll hear often—but insists it needs
more polishing. Eager to please, you dive into revisions, often without
compensation or a guarantee of production. It’s a precarious position, working
on faith that this person can deliver. But who is this “producer”? What’s their
track record? Are they industry veterans or newcomers?
The reality is, this
producer likely has multiple scripts in the pipeline, each at different stages,
hoping one will lead to a production deal. Whether yours will be the chosen one
is uncertain. But being considered is a step in the right direction, even if
the path ahead is unclear. It’s a common hurdle in the screenwriting journey,
one that requires patience and a bit of optimism.
The crux of the matter
is compensation for rewrites. It’s unlikely that a producer expressing interest
is paying you for these revisions, nor is it probable they’ve formalized the
relationship with an option agreement and meaningful financial commitment.
The notorious dollar
option deal is a red flag. It’s a token gesture where a producer offers a
nominal sum to legally option your script, often just enough to buy a coffee.
This should prompt caution; if a producer truly believes in your work, they
should be willing to invest more substantially.
The amount that
constitutes “substantial” varies, but it’s a measure of the producer’s
commitment. A genuine producer will put their money where their mouth is,
providing some financial assurance of their intentions.
Beware of the chummy
facade some producers may adopt. While they may sing your praises during the
option period, their tune often changes if they fail to advance your script.
Remember, in Hollywood, business relationships often masquerade as friendships.
It’s a tough industry, so navigate with caution and keep your wits about you.
There are indeed sharks in these waters.
THE OUTLINING PROCESS (PT. 2)
THE OUTLINING PROCESS PART II: GO IN-DEPTH
In crafting a more
detailed outline, we delve into the specifics that bring the story to life:
Joe’s Workday: We open with Joe at his job.
What’s his profession? He’s in a luxurious office, indicating a high-ranking
position. He has a private secretary and is surrounded by colleagues he’s known
for years, including his friend Ron.
The Drive Home: Joe’s journey home in his upscale
car, listening to jazz, sets a relaxed tone. He arrives at his expansive house,
noting another car in the driveway—his wife’s.
Home Life: Inside, Joe’s actions are routine:
checking mail, loosening his tie, pouring a drink. He settles into work at his
home office desk.
A Troubling Discovery: Time passes, and Joe
notices his wife’s absence. He searches the house, leading to a grim discovery
in the bedroom—his wife, lifeless, a victim of strangulation.
Police Interrogation: A detective questions Joe,
probing into their marriage and fidelity. Joe’s responses paint a picture of a
troubled but loving relationship.
Return to Normalcy: Days later, Joe struggles to
focus at work. Ron offers support and invites him out, but Joe declines, still
enveloped in grief.
An Unexpected Encounter: At a local bar, Joe
meets Carla, sparking a connection. They bond over drinks and shared
experiences of heartache.
A Night with Carla: The scene shifts to Jill’s
modest home, where passion ignites between her and Joe, leading to an intimate
night.
Another Shock: The next morning, Joe awakens in Carla’s bed, alone. A voicemail hints at concern for Carla’s whereabouts. Joe’s search ends in horror as he finds Carla’s body in the bathtub, echoing his wife’s fate.
This expanded outline
provides a richer narrative, setting the stage for a complex tale of mystery
and emotion. It’s the intricate details that transform a simple plot into a
captivating screenplay.
Details are the essence
of storytelling. They enrich the narrative, bringing it closer to a vivid
reality. As you continue to refine your outline, adding dialogue and subtle
intricacies, you’ll gain an increasingly sharp vision of your screenplay. By
the time you’re ready to draft, you’ll have a comprehensive understanding of
your characters and plot points, essential for weaving a compelling and
marketable story.
Outlining is often
misunderstood as a constraint on creativity, but it’s quite the opposite. It’s
a canvas for your imagination, allowing you to visualize your film in its
entirety before committing to the full script. It’s far more efficient to tweak
a 20 to 40-page outline than to overhaul a cumbersome screenplay.
Remember, an outline
isn’t a rigid contract. It’s a guide that you can diverge from as your
characters evolve and your story unfolds. Discovering new paths along the way
is part of the creative process. By ironing out the details early on, you
ensure that your narrative arc is solid from start to finish, smoothing out the
journey through those 110 pages.
If you like novels about creativity -- about screenwriting -- then you'll probably really enjoy
THE OUTLINING PROCESS (PT. 1)
THE OUTLINING PROCESS
Outlining is a pivotal
step in screenwriting, serving as a roadmap for your narrative. The depth of an
outline can vary greatly among writers, from simple bullet points to extensive
30-40 page documents. A more detailed outline can streamline the writing
process, providing clarity on character details, settings, and plot developments
that drive the story forward.
The Bullet Point
Outline offers a high-level view of each scene, focusing on the essential plot
points without delving into specifics. For
example:
· Joe arrives home from
work to find his wife’s dead body in the bedroom.
· He’s interviewed by a
police detective.
· A week later, Joe
struggles to get through his day at work.
· Post-work, Joe drowns
his sorrows at a bar, meeting Carla, an attractive woman.
· They return to his
place for an intimate night.
· Joe wakes up to find Carla dead beside him!
While this outline sets
up the first act, it’s just scratching the surface. As you flesh out your
script, you’ll encounter questions that require deeper thought. Addressing
these early on can save time and ensure your story’s elements are cohesive and
compelling. Remember, the outline is not just about sequencing events; it’s
about envisioning the film in your mind and laying a solid foundation for your
screenplay.
Let’s delve deeper into
the bullet points to flesh out the narrative and character details:
Joe’s Arrival Home: Starting with Joe’s arrival
might be too abrupt. It could be beneficial to first depict Joe’s work life to
provide context. Is he a blue-collar worker or a corporate executive? His work
environment and interactions with colleagues can offer insights into his
character. The type of neighborhood and house he returns to will also paint a
picture of his socioeconomic status and lifestyle.
The Discovery: When Joe enters his home, his
actions can reveal much about his relationship with his wife. Does he eagerly
search for her or nonchalantly grab a beer? The discovery of his wife’s body
should be shocking, and the method of her murder—stabbing, shooting,
strangulation—will set the tone for the investigation.
Police Interview: During the interview with the
detective, Joe’s demeanor and responses can hint at his innocence or possible
guilt. His emotional state, the questions asked, and his answers will shape the
audience’s perception of him.
Returning to Work: Joe’s behavior at work
post-tragedy can show his coping mechanisms. Is he withdrawn or pretending to
be strong? Introducing or re-introducing a colleague who may have had an affair
with Joe’s wife adds complexity to the plot.
Meeting Carla: The setting of the bar where Joe
meets Carla can influence the mood of the scene. Their interaction, who
initiates contact, and Carla’s background are crucial elements that will affect
the dynamics between them.
The Morning After: The circumstances of Carla’s death, whether similar to Joe’s wife’s or different, will raise questions about Joe’s involvement. His immediate actions upon discovering Carla’s body will be telling—does he call the police, a lawyer, or try to cover it up?
By asking these
questions and exploring the answers, you can create a more layered and
compelling story. Each detail adds depth to the characters and their world,
making the screenplay not just a series of events, but a story that feels real
and engaging. By probing deeper and asking questions about your scenes, you
enhance your ability to chart the course of your screenplay. This process of
inquiry not only clarifies the sequence of events but also enriches the world
you’re creating, offering a clearer vision of the story’s trajectory and the
characters’ journeys within it. It’s a method that ensures your screenplay
unfolds with purpose and direction, resonating with authenticity and depth.
Check out my screenwriting e-book A BEAST IS BORN!
WHY DO WE CREATE?
Here’s a question to ponder: What drives us to create? Is it the allure of FAME? The pursuit of GLORY? The desire for WEALTH? Fame can be elusive—how many screenwriters can we name off the top of our heads? William Goldman, Shane Black… and then? Glory is fleeting—who remembers the latest Oscar winner for Best Screenplay? And wealth? According to the Writers Guild, the average screenwriter’s salary isn’t the stuff of dreams. If you’re seeking fame, glory, or fortune, screenwriting might not be the path for you. For me, it’s the Creative Process—the thrill of nurturing a mere idea into a full-fledged, marketable screenplay. And if that script becomes a film, or brings a touch of recognition and financial reward, that’s just a bonus. The true excitement lies in what happens after your work is released into the world. Once, I had an experience that crystallized why I create. It was a moment that defined the essence of my passion for creation. During a recent phone conversation, a friend and business associate shared her enthusiasm for my latest screenplays. Despite my modesty, she was adamant about their excellence and thoroughly enjoyed them. She’s even working on elevating them to producers. She also brought up a short film I made, which she adored and shared widely. One of her friends, feeling down at the time, found joy and laughter in it, brightening their day. That feedback is incredibly rewarding. It’s affirming to know that a simple creative endeavor, born from a desire for fun and expression, could lift someone’s spirits. That’s the power of creation. This is the essence of why I create. It’s a reminder for all creators—whether you’re writing, filming, painting, or photographing—to recognize the potential impact of your work. It’s a testament to your existence and influence on others. Remember this as you create: your work can touch lives in unexpected, meaningful ways. It’s a declaration that says, “I was here.”
Check out my screenwriting e-book A BEAST IS BORN...
ACTION SEQUENCES: A BALANCING ACT
Recently, I critiqued
an action script that, while narratively sound, lacked the punch in its action
sequences. The scenes were static, missing the visceral impact essential for
the genre. This is a common pitfall when the prose is too passive or
descriptive without being evocative.
When crafting action
scenes, consider the level of detail necessary to paint a clear picture without
dictating every punch. It’s about striking a balance between guiding the
reader’s imagination and allowing room for the director’s vision.
For example, instead of detailing every blow in a fight scene, focus on the pivotal moments that define the characters’ skills, the stakes, and the outcome. Use active verbs and vary sentence lengths to mimic the rhythm of the action.
To truly grasp the art
of action writing, study the works of accomplished screenwriters like Shane
Black. His screenplay for The Long Kiss
Goodnight exemplifies how to write compelling action that’s both
descriptive and engaging, without being overly prescriptive.
EXT. THE FRONT PORCH – JUST OUTSIDE THE DOOR – NIGHT
THE CAROLERS continue their interesting rendition. Snowflakes fall. All is
quiet. All is bright.
Especially bright is the SHOTGUN BARREL pressed to the throat of the lead
soprano.
The weapon’s a HE-109. Over and under combo. Shotgun on top. High explosive
cannon on bottom.
You’d sing shitty too.
INT. HOUSE – SAME
Samantha walks to the door. Carrying a bowl of festive M&M’s. Just as she
gets to the door –
The singing stops.
The sound of FOOTFALLS. Running off into the night.
Samantha frowns, puzzled. OPENS THE DOOR.
The carolers are gone.
MR. BARNES remains. Gun in hand.
Escaped convict. Trained killer.
BARNES: Evening, Charly. Long time.
He swings the gun. SLAMS the barrel into her.
Glass shatters. M&M’s everywhere.
She gapes at him. Dumbstruck, unable to THINK.
Hurry it up, lady, we need a decision, live or die –
SHE GRABS THE GUN BARREL
Snaps out of it, just like that. Wrenches the gun –
They reel and rock.
ON THE STAIRS
Appears seven-year-old CAITLIN, eyes like saucers:
CAITLIN: Mommy...!
SAMANTHA: GET OUUTTTT!!!!
Sam’s cry is a veritable shriek, as
HAL
Appears, snarling. POUNCES on Barnes –
Succeeds in annoying him.
For his trouble, Hal gets three broken ribs and a trip to the fireplace.
Airborne. Comes down, bam!
He catches fire. SCREAMS. Rolls over and over on his broken ribs, as
BARNES
Kicks Samantha in the gut. She collapses onto the stairs. Splinters the
banister.
The he sees CAITLIN. Top of the stairs, she’s paralyzed.
SAMANTHA: NO!!!!
Barnes is already moving forward. SPIN-COCKS the shotgun, draws a bead –
Promptly slips on the festive M&M’s. Goes down.
Gun goes off, WHAM--! A flat concussion.
The banister EXPLODES. A storm of wood chips, as
SAMANTHA
Surges up the stairs, toward her daughter –
BARNES. On the ground. Fires, WHAM!
The wall disappears THREE INCHES FROM CAITLIN’S HEAD.
Blown to shreds, you can SEE OUTDOORS.
Samantha doesn’t miss a beat. GRABS her daughter –
FLINGS HER OUTSIDE.
Through the hole in the wall. Takes her by the belt and fucking HURLS her out
into space!
EXT. SIDE OF HOUSE – SAME TIME
Two stories up. The kid is ejected, flailing.
Floats in SLOW MOTION. Across a ten foot gap –
INTO THE TREEHOUSE.
Sails head over heels into the place. Hits with a CRASH. Alive and unhurt.
BACK INSIDE THE HOUSE
Samantha didn’t even look. Didn’t need to.
Here comes BARNES. Up the staircase. Reloading.
Samantha launches herself down the stairs.
COLLIDES, head on. Down they go.
Barnes, rolls to his feet. Propels her into the KITCHEN.
INT. KITCHEN - SAME TIME
She hits, WHAM, spray of cat food –
SKIDDING. Across the linoleum.
Slams to a stop. Hard. Cupboard pops open, out comes the IRONING BOARD. Falls
into place, SNAP--!
A GUN BLAST disintegrates it. Reveals Sam, cowering behind.
BARNES: I want my eye back, bitch.
Samantha struggles to her feet. Dazed. Barnes abandons the shotgun. Takes the
IRON down from its spot on the shelf –
Begins to beat her with it.
Savagely. Methodically.
Samantha takes hit after hit. Head snapping to and fro. Reeling backward...
Still he comes. No mercy. SLAM. To the head.
Bleeding now. Stumbles...Raises her arms pitifully –
Still he hits her. DENTS the iron.
BARNES: Goddamn you. Fight me. What’s wrong with you, fight me!
You don’t need to
emulate Shane Black to enhance your action scenes. The key is to inject
energy and visual flair into your writing. Instead of a bland description
like “Joe punches Jack and Jack falls on the floor,” try something more dynamic
that paints a picture and conveys the intensity of the moment. For instance:
“Joe’s fist rockets forward, a blur of fury, connecting with Jack’s jaw. Jack’s body crumples, hitting the floor with a thud that echoes the punch’s impact.”
This approach not only
makes the scene more engaging but also helps the reader visualize the action as
if they’re watching it unfold on the big screen. Keep your action vivid,
concise, and full of momentum to capture the essence of a cinematic experience.
Elevating action scenes in a screenplay involves using vivid, dynamic language
and varying sentence structure to create a sense of urgency and movement. Here
are some examples:
Before: “John runs through the
forest. He jumps over a log.”
After: “John
barrels through the dense forest, heart pounding. He vaults over a fallen log,
barely touching the ground.”
Before: “Sarah and Mike engage in a
sword fight. They block and attack.”
After: “Sarah and Mike’s blades
dance in a deadly rhythm, clashing and sparking. With each expert parry, their
eyes lock—two warriors in a ballet of steel.”
Before: “The car chase speeds through the city
streets.”
After: “The muscle car roars down
the city streets, tires screeching as it weaves through traffic. Buildings blur
past, horns blare, and the chase is a symphony of adrenaline.”
Before: “The building explodes.”
After: “A deafening roar rips
through the air as the building erupts into a fireball, sending a shockwave
that shatters windows and showers the street with debris.”
Before: “Anna dives into the water to save the
child.”
After: “Anna plunges into the churning waters, her arms slicing through the waves in a desperate race against time to reach the flailing child.”
By focusing on the
sensory details and the emotional stakes of the scene, you can transform
straightforward descriptions into memorable moments that leap off the page.
Remember to use strong verbs, vary your sentence lengths, and focus on the
characters’ experiences to bring your action scenes to life. Your goal is to
create a script that’s not just a blueprint for production but also an
enthralling read that captures the essence of the action-packed story you’re
telling.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
